Friday, February 22, 2008

Where we're at.

As much as were both really glad to be home, its a really hard adjustment. Everyone keeps saying that culture shock is way worse on the way home, but I think for us its not as much culture shock as just really seriously missing Jinja. Sometimes its really hard to explain our entire seven months to people in a 3 minute conversation. Everyone is so curious and wants to know what it was like, and for lack of an appropriate question people often say, "So, you had a good time?" and were like...ya..i guess? I mean lots of times were good but lots of times were also really hard...kind of like everything in life!! Its really hard to sum up seven months.... Its hard to be motivated to look for jobs or pursue career stuff when all we want to do is look at pictures or listen to african music or reorganize our african stuff or think about africa ALL the time. It kind of feels like being transplanted out of one body and into another. I miss my old body because i really belonged there and i had a special place, and in my new body no one knows who i am and all the other organs are nice but none of them are saved and sometimes its just hard to not have a really close saved organ friend. Okay i pushed that analogy too far but you know what i mean...We just left such an awesome christian community and its really hard to find that kind of community here in canada - in Jinja we could go to bible study 6 nights a week if we wanted to and I cant find a bible study here to save my life. It is really good to be back in my church but at the same time this first sunday back was really hard for me. The energy was totally different and I kept wishing I could look across and see my friends Ronnie and David and Em and Peter playing and singing, and George Haumba with his eyes all squinted shut dancing away, and papa clapping slowly the way he does, and elder ben in his sean john dragon shirt, and stanley in his bow tie, and mama giving me a big hug during the "sometimes i feel like greeting" part. Its the weirdest feeling - so good to be home, yet so hard to be away. We miss EVERYTHING about africa. The sun, the food, the people, the culture, even the dust. I miss never having to be on time. I miss washing my feet at the end of the day and always sweating. I miss POSHO and BEANS. I miss our dogs brownie and blackie. I miss my deckers and my house. I miss bodas. I miss Pauline. I miss DC Jinja. I miss thunderstorms that sound like warfare. But most of all I miss my babies and my friends. We expected to work with babies and love the culture, but we werent expecting to make such amazing friendships. Our friends tell us that theyve never met white people like us before and that weve made such a difference in their lives...theres just no way to explain how whatever difference we made to them, the difference they made to us is 10 times that big. And I think thats the biggest reason that its so darn hard to say goodbye. As hard as we try, we'd never be able to express the change that happened in our hearts and lives. We'll never be able to tell people what its like to walk through the baby's home gate in the morning and have Brian book it over to get a hug, how it feels to cuddle sophie and george as they go to sleep, how incredible it feels to be singing along to Raoul leading worship in Lingala, how at home we felt. The relationships we made with all our friends are like none we have here. They are really indescribable. We just love our friends there in a totally different way. They got to know us so deeply and we got to know them so deeply. We are so thankful for the support that all our friends and family gave us while away. There have been times where we needed your prayers so badly and felt them. We couldnt have gone without the financial support that so many of you offered. We just can't say thank you enough. So from us, we say thank you and God bless you. We're going to continue to post so whenever your bored...check us out. Until next time....


Anonymous said...

You said it well. I empathize with you.
I have appreciated all your blogs. Thank you
Amy - what are you doing now?
Bethany - what are you doing now?
Long range plans?
A. Margo

Rachel and Arielle said...

Hi girls!
Your post made me hurt so much for both of you. It was so evident, especially being here in Jinja with you, that Jinja is your home. Your hearts will be here forever and I feel so sad that you are having a hard time being home. Isn't that great though? That you loved it here so much that you will always have the warmest, best memories of being here. Anyways I'm sitting at Your cafe right now, wishing you guys would bop in with your U&Me's and tell us about the drama that was going on with your church friends. Jinja misses you as much as you miss it!!!! I love you both!

Victoria said...

I was glad to see that you are posting again. I know that God will direct your paths and you never know, you both might end up right back in Jinja:)